One would assume that the popularity would be the preference of the youngsters as being popular one thinks that he would have more friends, higher self-esteem and a better chance to get into a relationship. However, many articles predict that it is not necessary that they are well-liked. This brings us to the topic of the day.
To the human being to grow, and to enjoy a good life, one needs to feel that they belong to the society they live in. One expression of whether you are in or you are around shown how much you are being liked by your family and the people around you. If they do not like you, you are unlikely to feel as if you belong to that place.
Being a Good Listener is the Key to Success
To assist you better, I have brought a short story for you. So, for the longest time, Julie was okay for not being liked by her colleagues and acquaintances. She believed that the main reason for this is because of how easily she spoke her mind. And she has no one about educating her about the norms. Her colleagues and acquaintances don’t like this behavior of hers and for this reason, people started avoiding interactions with her unless it was necessary. One day she walked into the office kitchen to get tea and there she found her colleagues seated discussing a football game.
She noticed the empty cups in front of them. Next start a formal conversation among the people when She said Hi to them and headed to the counter to refill her cup. She watched that game and thought that the final touchdown was so good and so she shared her thoughts ready to enjoy the broken fill with football conversation. Instead, each of the three persons who sated that table murmured, shook their heads in agreement and went back to their work station.
Sitting alone in the break room, she realized that not being liked is affecting the quality of her life and started thinking of how to be better. It started with the lesson on the importance of listening to the people around you and hearing what they are saying to you. As she was browsing articles on the internet, she found one which was talking about being a good listener. Since then, she started listening to everyone and then share her opinion based on what was being said. She became a good listener.
However, a question stuck in her mind. Was she hearing what another person is saying or is she simply waiting for her turn to speak? It is a fact that when you are waiting for your turn to speak, you are not paying attention to anyone who is saying. When people perceive that you are the kind of person who does this, whether unconsciously without their knowing it or worse still consciously, they will like you less.
To show someone that you are listening, begin with a short summary of what they just said. This will assure the other person that you are following their sayings and also informs that what you are going to say next. When you are with your friends and they know that you are a good listener, they will always find a way to convey their thoughts to you. Asking questions during interactions is also another way to become more likable. But this can only be possible if the person who you are speaking to enjoys giving an answer.
If you ask a question that offends your date the first time you meet, you would probably never get a second chance. The same goes for such other questions that seem patronizing or ones that are asked only to make small conversations rather than to converse. Note that if they enjoy talking about it makes you more likable to them because they feel good doing such interactions. They then associate you with such feelings.
Compliments Rarely Go Wrong, Especially When You Know Where To Target Them
When you say nice about someone, they feel good about it. When you compliment people on things, they have worked so hard, they feel even better and this makes them like you more.
Showing your weaknesses also has a way of getting people to be comfortable. You must have heard that imperfections make you relatable.
This is the perfect example of it. For instance, Julie opened up her struggles with being liked by her sisters. Her sister was very sympathetic and she shared some advice on how to get it done which the older sister found useful. Julie argued with her sister as she likes her sister a little more because of her vulnerability.
Too much information, however, makes you look like a victim and unless someone has an unhealthy savior syndrome. They would not like you more for this. In the next meeting, wait for the right moment and talk about the weakness you have and see how your friends react. Being honest even if it is not your favorite gives you a few more likes as well. You will seem less manipulative even if the other person doesn’t want to hear it.
Conclusion
By now, I’m pretty sure that you have got some ideas and tips to become more likable. But are you confused about where should you start? You just need to realize your mistakes and start by looking at yourself and observing your behavior. See how are you interacting with people right now, and plan ways to become a better person.
